- Barista: A 16oz quad soy caramel macchiato with one pump of chai. And what was your name?
- Me: Lucian, with an 'a'.
- Barista: Really? That's such a unique and awesome name! We should go out sometime.
- Me: Sure! Wait, what was your name again?
- Barista: Jennifer
- Me: Hey, that's great! 'Cause if you see no problem with asking a guy out simply because his name is uniquely awesome, then you'll understand why I see no problem turning down offers from girls with common and mediocre names. *smile*
- Barista: ..........
- Me: Just kidding! Please don't spit in my coffee... Please...
My biggest regret ever is bringing my milkshake. It brought all of these boys over to my yard, and they started arguing saying mine was better than theirs. So I told them, “damn right, it’s better than yours.” Eventually I taught them, but they of course had to pay.
WHAT IS IT